"you’re too cute to be single!"
then date me
This boy at Target asked if I would hold his hand because his ex girlfriend just walked in with a new guy, so naturally I felt bad and held his hand while strolling around Target for a bit. Then it donned on me, with no other couple in sight, that was the best damn pick up line ever pulled.
i wonder how i’m gonna die. will i be shot because they’re jealous of my massive penis? car crash because i’m distracted by my massive penis? die of old age, i have a massive penis
the wifi is down and i just heard someone yell “there is no internet there is no hope”
the wifi died